New Year's Eve In The OC, September 2009
My Journeys Behind The Orange Curtain, Part Six
We
had visited a family deep in the OC to observe their Christmas rituals nine
months ago. This family unit had recently given birth to a tiny baby.
Wanting to observe indigenous birth rituals, Lisa and I ignored our
friends' pleas to stay, laughing in the face of it all, daring to journey south, south
on the 405 Freeway, crossing the border into this savage land of untamed business parks
and planned communities. This is the sixth in a thrilling series of
undercover exposés that dares to explore the native people in their natural
habitat, deep behind
The Orange Curtain, the mysterious land seen in "The
OC", "Laguna
Beach", and "The
Real Housewives of Orange County".
Page 6 of an ongoing series
Lisa and I were invited by the family whose given names only begin with "J" to witness them performing indigenous rites for a newborn member of their clan. Arming ourselves with the necessary survival gear, we cut through large swathes of planned communities, not knowing what to expect. But, as before, the Family Whose Names Are "J" greeted us warmly at the door, immediately giving Lisa the newborn to hold. "This is a custom of our people," Father James explained, "it brings us good luck to have the first visitor through the door hold the one we call Little Joah." |
 Little
Joah immediately squeaked with delight, producing spittle and looking
straight into the camera. Lisa and I were astonished at how many of
the sounds Little Joah emitted resembled those of newborns in Los Angeles
County, and recorded some of them to bring back for the professors at the
Linguistic Anthropology Department at UCLA to study. |
 As
Mother Jigi squeezed Little Joah, the newborn produced sounds similar to
those of a bicycle horn. Although amused, we dared not laugh for fear
of offending the Family Whose Names Are "J". Indeed, no one else
seemed to look as if this were anything but normal. |
 Having
seen a camera on our previous visit, The Family Whose Names Are "J" looked
at ease with the device, with Jillian, Little Joah, Little Joe, and Joshua
smiling. |
 Big
Joe seared meat outside in preparation for the Orange County Newborn
Festival in an enormous almost luminous grill with enormous silver knobs.
"With the chicken wings," he said, "the secret is to marinate it with a
little Louisiana hot sauce, but dilute it with water." Lisa and I
looked at each other in amazement, since Joe distinctly referred to a region
outside the OC. Were they able to intercept transmissions from outside
the OC?"The tri-tip is just soy sauce, sesame oil, and garlic powder, nothing more," Joe continued. "You marinate it in this overnight. Simple." |
 Big
Joe's mention of soy sauce provoked much discussion between Lisa and I and
The Family Whose Names Are "J". Lisa wondered aloud if it were
possible that this family, and much of the people in the OC who bore a
striking resemblance to this family, may have descended from people in China
long, long ago. The OC natives believed this possible. "And look
at you," Uncle Javid, a professor in the OC, mused, "You too bear an uncanny
resemblance to us as well. As fantastic as it sounds, it may be
possible that all of our ancestors trace our roots back to China." |
 Father
James then held up Little Joah, who, at only three months of age, sang a
chorus of "I Write The Songs" by Barry Manilow. Although his pitch was
not perfect and he missed a couple of notes, Lisa and I were still deeply
impressed. |
 Father
James, Little Joah, the mother of James, Uncle Javid, and Jichelle begin to
eye the feast, as Uncle Javid intoned sacred monotone chants for Little
Joah's well-being. |
 After
Uncle Javid finished his incantations for his blessings, Father James and
Mother Jigi wrapped Little Joah in a ritual sheath. "This is a common
OC ritual," Mother Jigi explained, "and although we don't know its origins,
we value it as part of our OC tradition." |
New Year's Eve In The OC
Miscellaneous Photos
Eleven Shadows Travel Page
Contact photographer/musician Ken Lee
Uncle
Javid, Mother Jigi, James' mother, and my mother and Dennis, the latter two
also daring visitors of the OC, compare and contrast the newborn rituals
between the outside world and the OC.
